Tuesday, February 19, 2008
The biggest news today is that Fidel Castro, the aged leader of Communist Cuba and track suit aficionado, will be retiring. Finally, the long national nightmare is over and we have defeated the godless Communists! Castro announced his retirement in his newspaper column. Can you imagine if our President had a newspaper column? Wouldn’t that be great? We could finally have a forum for insights like these unencumbered by the idiot “journalists.”
Pakistan held elections yesterday which saw President Musharraf’s party losing seats in Parliament to the two opposition parties. There were clashes at polling stations all across the country with dozens reported dead, but most experts say the elections were relatively free and fair (so about as good as Florida). President Musharraf may be removed from power by the new opposition-controlled parliament or he may step down himself. This won’t really effect the United States, since we do whatever the hell we want in Pakistan. If anyone asks you about this, just say that it will likely strain ethnic and tribal tensions in Pakistan (that is my go-to answer for when anyone asks me about anything having to do with Pakistan).
Keep an eye on the Wisconsin Democratic Primary Election today and watch as people are prepare for next week’s elections in Texas and Ohio. Many stories are highlighting the irony that a campaign that has been so dominated by race and gender issues is coming down to states where the largest voting blocks are white men. I, for one, think it is about damn time that white men decided something in this country.
Today’s New York Time’s column that if you replaced “Obama” with “Arcade Fire” could be a pitchfork review: David Brooks! Congratulations Mr. Brooks, don’t forget to pick up your gift bag. I guess they still tease him in the Times newsroom for this, so he felt the need to get some street cred back. For the record, this blog totally knew about Obama before he went all main-stream and thinks his early stuff was way better.
Friday, January 18, 2008
Today is a bit of a news vacuum, the majority of today’s stories are previews of things that might happen. The Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke testified to Congress yesterday and said that he backs some kind of economic stimulus package to avoid a recession. Congress is getting all lovey-dovey and will supposedly have something together by the end of the month. The White House has also said they have a plan, which, surprise surprise, involves tax cuts.
Filed under, it sucks to live there, an interesting article on how Islamic militants are becoming a stronger presence in the Pakistani city of Peshawar. It is a symbol of how the kind of conflict that used to be restricted to the border is now spreading into major urban centers. Additionally, the CIA has figured out who killed Benazir Bhutto! It was… some tribal leader no one outside of Pakistan has ever heard of! Oh, AND AL-QAEDA! That is an assassination I can sink my teeth into.
This weekend will see the next two major Presidential primaries. The Republicans are having primaries in South Carolina and in Nevada while the Democrats only have a primary in Nevada. The Democrats primary in South Carolina is next week for some reason. This is Nevada’s first time being so early in the nominating process. They were moved up so that there would be some geographic and ethnic diversity in the nominating process and because the parties needed a good long reliever. Even though they are rookies, they have really stepped up their game and are performing like seasoned professionals — the first lawsuit between powerful special interests trying to manipulate voting was settled today. Speaking of voting, the David Brooks has a column in the Times that summarizes How Voters Think. Let’s see if I can summarize, “voters vote for someone for any number of reasons. Some of those reasons are smart. Some of those reasons are stupid, but I am still going to act like they make sense. I am really, really smart.”
The Directors Guild of America (DGA) has reached a deal with the major Hollywood studios. The DGA is the union that represents Hollywood film and television directors. Some people are saying that this deal could be the blueprint for a deal with the striking writers guild, which would mean that LOST would finally come back. However, if the Writers’ Guild of America (WGA) does reach a deal, our supply of quirky and quirkier Op-Eds will dry up they all go back to writing for Two and a Half Men.
One last thing, the Iraqi National Security Advisor has an interesting OP-Ed in the Washington Post on a possible political solution for Iraq. I didn’t know he was a member of the WGA.
