Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Your Morning News 4.9.08
Posted by Jeff in Barack Obama, david petraeus, easter island, hillary clinton, john mccain, mary-louise parker, Olympics, san francisco, Your Morning News
Petraeus-mania swept Washington yesterday, as Senators were lining up left and right to question the good General on troop levels, pullout dates, and if he’s married (watch out, girls – he is!). Petraeus held the line, saying troop reductions need to be paused to hold onto our “significant and uneven” progress. All three presidential candidates left South Dakotan babies unkissed as they tried to prove themselves worthy of a 3am phone call – McCain and Clinton played the ‘Congressional insult’ version of phone-tag, and Obama just talked for a while. And then a while longer.
The increasingly controversial Olympic torch arrives in San Francisco today. The logic behind the choice of American city almost makes sense – “Hey, they’ve got a big Chinatown and stuff!” – but then you realize, oh yeah, it’s still San Francisco, naked hippie capital of the world.
A Finnish tourist was fined $17,500 for chipping the earlobe off of one of the infamous Easter Island statues. Just saying, that’s some pretty inexpensive cosmetic surgery.
Finally today, my prayers have been answered: Mary-Louise Parker broke off her engagement to Weeds co-star Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Now, to knock off Tina Fey’s husband.