Tuesday, June 10, 2008
9:00 pm – NBA Finals : “Game 3: Celtics at Lakers” (ABC)
The big question tonight is if the Celtics can win on the road. They arrive in Hollywood with a 2-0 lead and with Paul Pierce still wearing a totally unnecessarily knee brace. Watch for the Lakers to pull the same stunt when in the third quarter a rabid fan charges the court to stab Kobe Bryant in the chest repeatedly. Bryant will be pronounced dead at the scene, only to return at the beginning of the fourth and score 27 unanswered points.
8:00 pm – Coupling (BBC America)
What? We are recommending a BBC show you have never heard of. Why yes Josh is writing the TV post tonight, why do you ask? Coupling is basically a funnier and sexier version of Friends. If you are looking for a light sitcom to enjoy over the summer, you could do a lot worse. If it sounds familiar, there was an American version that launched in 2003, but it tanked and was quickly canceled. If you like the Office, you might want to give this a shot.
9:00 pm – Futurama (Comedy Central)
Listen, Jeff warned you yesterday, summer is here so there just isn’t that much on and we are going to be recommending some syndicated shows. But if you don’t like basketball (or are just creeped out by Larry Bird’s shoulders) this is a classic episode of Futurama. It’s the one where Fry goes back to college, Bender joins a frat and a bowler hat makes a monkey super-intelligent.
LATE NIGHT
Letterman has Mark Wahlberg, Leno has Justin Timberlake and Conan has Jeff Corwin. Colbert has Alan Rabinowitz, an expert on tigers, and Stewart has Ralph Reed, the head of the Christian Coalition. $10 says that Colbert is grills his guest on the dangers of tigers harder than Stewart grills his on the dangers of religion in politics.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
7:30 – The Weather Man (Showtime)
Nic Cage is great in the 2005 Academy Award winner for Best Use of Camel Toe.
9:00 – Lost (ABC)
Watch some flabby naked gay guy and an ex-army colonel fighting for a million dollars. Or something. God, I hate this show. (Note: It’s preceded by some dumb special called “Lost: Past, Present, and Future”, but I will bet this entire blog that there is absolutely nothing new about the future revealed.)
9:00 – Futurama: “Time Keeps on Slipping” (Comedy Central)
One of the best episodes of the series, and I’m not just saying that because of my Harlem Globetrotters fetish. Okay, maybe I’m just saying that because of my Harlem Globetrotters fetish.
Late Night
Eva Longoria Parker, fresh off of her marriage to Spider-Man, is on Letterman. Julia Louis-Dreyfus is on Ferguson. There’s a definite chance of the two of them making out in my dreams tonight as well. (Letterman and Ferguson, that is.)
Friday, January 25, 2008
Watching TV on a Friday night, hmm? Okay, nerds, here’s your dorky TV listings for losers.
9:15 – X-Men: The Last Stand (HBO2)
But only if you’re playing the X-Men 3 drinking game. It’s easy! Every time Brett Ratner ruins an awesome franchise, change the channel.
9:30 – Winter X-Games (ESPN)
Snowmobile racing is awesome, if only because it upholds the golden rule: “If it haveth a motor, race it.” Also, every now and then they crash into a frozen lake. Probably.
9:30 – Futurama: “Luck of the Fryish” (COM)
In this time of probable recession, I recommend turning to the episodes of Futurama concerned with the early 2000s for financial advice.
Late Night
Nathan Lane on Letterman, Diane Lane on Ferguson, Senator Barack Lane on rerun Conan, and Jimmy Kimmel resets the “Days Since We Had Adam Carolla On” sign back to zero.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Let’s cut the crap. You’re probably going to be watching the two hour American Idol premiere tonight, ostensibly to make fun of the pathetic attempts by Philadelphians to evolve out of their primordial ooze and sing. But somewhere behind your jeering mask of irony lies a 6-year-old choir boy who would give anything to be the next Clay Aiken. Listen: friends don’t let friends Idol.
7:00 – Batman Begins (FX)
Somebody watch this and explain this whole Ra’s Al Ghul thing to me, I still don’t get it.
9:00 – Futurama: Anthology of Interest I (Comedy)
Rumor is Al Gore is going to announce his candidacy during his guest spot in this 8 year old episode of a canceled TV show.
10:00 – Pioneers of Television: Late Night (PBS)
Writer’s strike got you down? Had that hankering for a little Jack Paar recently? Check out this fawning overview of late night network television that covers all the greats – and probably Jay Leno too.
Late Night
Letterman’s got Denzel Washington and Don Rickles, and Drew Carey is stopping by Craig Ferguson to reminisce about their Drew Carey Show days/ask for a loan.
