Thursday, November 27, 2008
Time for the most special television day of the year: Thanksgiving! Prepare for hundreds of crappily computer animated turkeys waddling across the screen at all times – just like this one! Look at him go, down the field! Rah rah rah!
It’s not that the TV is particularly good or anything today, but it certainly is plentiful and it provides the perfect excuse to stay the hell away from the kitchen, because face it, you’re not qualified for anything besides opening the canned cranberry sauce. After the jump, your full guide to the day’s boob tube festivities.
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Monday, November 3, 2008
8:30 EST – Monday Night Football: Steelers at Redskins (ESPN)
Jeff’s fantasy implication: Santana Moss. Pleeeeease catch four touchdowns tonight. Pleeeeeeeeease.
9:00 – Saturday Night Live Presidential Bash 2008 (NBC)
I can live with the idea of there being SNL content on nights that are not Saturdays, but it’s just plain awkward when they try to do the “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night” opening on any night but Saturday. Well, NBC.com promises that this will be a “2 HOUR BLOW OUT” of some sort of another. Hey, one more Palin imitation for the road, Tina Fey?
9:00 – Die Another Day (Spike)
Remember back when James Bond still had crazy gadgets and gizmos? You know, instead of blond hair and feelings? Well, if you don’t, Die Another Day will gladly remind you. Next question: they were really, really close to spinning off Halle Berry’s character into her own movie – would this have been a good thing because of 90 minutes of Halle Berry in a bikini on screen, or a bad thing because it would’ve been just as bad as Catwoman? Discuss.
Late Night
Paris Hilton is a fine, upstanding young woman on Letterman, Leno is apparently featuring something involving SeaWorld (……yeah), 2.0somethings mancrush Brian Williams is on Conan, Doris Kearns Goodwin plagiarizes her witty retorts to Jon Stewart on the Daily Show, and the Atlantic’s Andrew Sullivan brags about how many bajillions of readers his stupid blog gets on Colbert.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
As previously tagged, it was a slow day on the ol Internets. But here’s what kept nagging at us to leap out there into the ether:
Friday, January 25, 2008
So, I forgot to mention earlier in the week that Fred Thompson has dropped out of the race — I guess I sorta forgot he was in it. Kinda like him. His departure, along with Dennis Kucinich‘s, means the average hotness of Presidential Candidate’s spouses has plummeted. This is a tragedy for the political process. But seriously, neither of them had enough of a following to really be able to swing their support behind one candidate or another.
The remaining Republican candidates debates in Florida last night and by all accounts it was really boring and none of them like Hillary Clinton.
The President and Congress yesterday came to an agreement on the stimulus package they have been talking about for the past week. The plan centers mostly around tax rebates and was the result of compromise between Republican and Democratic leaders. Don’t worry, I’m sure it will dissolve into acrimony in no time. However, these is a good chance those of us who are totally broke will get a nice-sized check in May.
President Bush gave a rare interview to USA Today (He likes the infographics) in which he discussed initiatives he is announcing in his upcoming State of the Union. He will be focusing on combating HIV/AIDS worldwide and on working to eliminate hunger. Most people think it is unlikely he will get anything done in his final year because, well, nobody likes him anymore.
I was under the impression that all French super criminals were suave and sophisticated. Apparently that is not the case, Jérôme Kerviel, a stock trader at one of the largest banks in France, lost the bank almost 5 billion euros. He was able to cover the whole thing up because he used to work on the banks computer system. And he made no money off the entire thing. Even though he is just outside of our age range (he is 31), Jérôme is the proud winner of our “2.0somethings Dumbass of the Week” award.
Finally, producers confirmed that the title of the new James Bond film will is The Quantum of Solace. Some people think it is kind of lame, and I might tend to agree. However, no matter what the title, chances are still high that Daniel Craig will shoot some people, blow up some cars, and that new Bond girl Gemma Arterton will be smokin’ hot.
